Despondency is not really a word i think of much but it has come up in client 1:1 sessions and in my own feelings recently. This winter has been hard and long. It has been an uncomfortable hibernation of realigning into the 5D and detoxing the 3D. There have been internal pressure and external pressures. It has not been easy. We are now on the edge of the Spring, we have the spring equinox here in the UK on Tuesday 20th March, which hopes to bring in fresh energy, fire and new beginnings. I felt this might a good time to address the feelings of despondency which will soon be cleared away with the wash of new energy. However, many will be experiencing or revisiting this feeling as they awaken from the 3D and make the transition through the ascension process over the next few months, years and decades.
For me, despondency belongs to the heart. It is much more than depression of the mind and it cannot be changed with the myriad of 'positive' thinking programs out there at the moment. It is much more than that, it is the low deep sadness of the heart collapsing under layers of dense smothering energy that does not feed love or joy. It is isolation and the denial of love. If you are reading this and don't know what i refer to then you are either extremely lucky, enlightened or in the unawareness of the 3D matrix. The 3D has fed us a toxic diet to lead us away from love and what really helps the heart to feel joy and to shine bright. Most of people's lives are hard and not living from the heart within the old matrix. I know this because of the extremely high number of people who are suffering from loneliness, depression either high or low level, anxiety and mental illness. (And i am not even referring to people who seek help or who are medically diagnosed). Our hearts are crying out for a change in the way we live and it starts with each one of us beginning the process of delayering the layers of crap and 'crapomud' ( my own word for the compaction of crap) clogging up the heart matrix.
What is the heart matrix? Most of us can recognise the physical heart as an organ in the body which pumps around our blood. We also have energetic functions of the heart in Chinese medicine which relate to the physical processes, for example, its role in creating the blood (not recognised in allopathic medicine as far as i know). Chinese Medicine also links functions to the emotions with the heart holding the processes of joy and also to the spirit, recognising the heart as the seat of the higher self or soul. In addition, as we move into the energetic layers of the body we have the heart chakra, the energy centre of the heart which covers the whole chest area and corresponding back area. The heart energy can open and expand like a flower using the heart chakra. In addition to this, my own work has shown me a complex structure sitting over the heart energy which is activated the more we align with our personal energy matrix sometimes called the Merkaba, diamond light vehicle or crystalline form. People working at this level are often very evolved beings who have built a structure of stability for the soul to incarnate and work inter-dimensionally.
I have been experiencing that the ascension process requires a clearing on the heart matrix to allow access to the 5D. The Heart as the seat of the soul needs to be clear and light, reflecting its nature into the world. The 5D is all about CREATION. This is how we will be able to manifest with intention instantly and more fully than we ever have been able to in the 3D. However, we cannot trick the heart and we can only work with heart's desire and joy. The heart is not interested in what is not part of its heart's desires. This will be unique to each individual and those individuals, having reached a certain level of ascension will probably not be interested in all the things we have hunted and chased in the 3D like money, fame, possessions that feed the ego and the mindsets coming from lack. Of course, there will be money, fame and possessions and there is no problem with that as these are all part of life and can bring joy and sadness alike, but they are no longer motivators when we enter the realm of the heart. The heart is motivated by Love and what feels right and this is what the 5D matrix becomes about - returning to the Heart.
Clearing the layers of despondency becomes part of the process of clarifying and reclaiming yourself. Layers include conditioning and all the ways you have denied your heart in your life and previous lifetimes. I include past lives as many of these coming up when working with clients and myself. Many evolved beings are incarnated now to finish, tie up and clean up old wounds and patterns that allow them to ascend in this lifetime. When they are ascend they also help the Earth to ascend. As we work this through our bodies, minds and emotions - we also work it through the physical realm for the Earth. Each bit we do helps to purify ourselves, our family lines, DNA, Communities, countries, the Land and the Earth. Our individual process may seem like a small insignificant thing but it will change the World we live in and return us to Joy.
The clearing process sometimes a revisiting of wounds to the heart. I could write another entirely new Blog post on this subject so i will keep it brief for now. I am not sure if anyone would actually want to read a whole article on heart wounding but it seems to be my specialist subject so let me know if you do. The Heart matrix is a a myriad complex diamond of love. It can become damaged when it's sensitivity is compromised by negative experiences. These often form the patterns of betrayal, shock, disbelief, confusion leading to self loathing and self hate. Betrayal is a very hard experience for the heart. ultimately it is a lesson that can lead us to the forgiveness process, often, not without a great deal of personal pain. I am noticing that clearing processes are becoming easier as we enter the 5D but we also become more aware of the layers that have been blocking our light. As we clear and clean up our own Heart matrix the Heart becomes more aware of how much it needs to reflect love and have it reflected back to it as a truth. This becomes more complicated as many people are still in 3D and cannot reflect back the love in the way that awakened people need it. Many people are still clearing out their Heart Matrices, so this again is not giving the 'feedback' to nourish the Heart for awakened people. Hopefully over time, we will all be able to seek out the ones that can and are operating from love. Hearts will become like bright beacons and hopefully we have all learnt enough in this Ascension process to follow our own intuitions and be guided towards the people and situations that feel 'right'. I am hoping that we will be working less in the 'dark' as individuals and there will be more collaborations and clusters of LIGHT.
I wish you all light and bright blessings on this journey.
If you would like to work with me. My one to one sessions are very reasonable and i enjoy connecting with beings of light to help you to shine.
Heart Matrix Session 1:1 £75